FOAAS
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README
FOAAS
Fuck Off As A Service
Please see README for use.
v0.0.1
Introduction
FOAAS (Fuck Off As A Service) provides a modern, RESTful, scalable solution to the common problem of telling people to fuck off.
Content Negotiation
FOAAS will respond to the following ‘Accept:’ values with appropriate content
- text/plain - Content will be returned as a plain string.
- application/json - Content will be returned as a JSON object { message: ‘message’, subtitle: ‘subtitle’ }
- text/html - Content will be returned as an HTML page with a twitter bootstrap hero unit, containing the message and the subtitle.
API
/off/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck off, :name. - :from’, e.g. /off/Tom/Chris will return ‘Fuck off, Tom - Chris’
/you/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck you, :name. - :from’, e.g. /you/Tom/Chris will return ‘Fuck you, Tom - Chris’
/this/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck this - :from’, e.g. /this/Chris will return ‘Fuck this. - Chris’
/that/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck that. - :from’, e.g. /that/Chris will return ‘Fuck that. - Chris’
/everything/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck everything. - :from’, e.g. /everything/Chris will return ‘Fuck everything. - Chris’
/everyone/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Everyone can go and fuck off. - :name’, e.g. /everyone/Tom will return ‘Everyone can go and fuck off. - Tom’
/donut/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘:name, go and take a flying fuck at a rolling donut. - :from’, e.g. /donut/Tom/Chris will return ‘Tom, go and take a flying fuck at a rolling donut. - Chris’
/shakespeare/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘:name, Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch! - :from’, e.g. /shakespeare/Falstaff/Prince%20Henry will return 'Falstaff, Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch! - Prince Henry
/linus/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘:name, there aren’t enough swear-words in the English language, so now I’ll have to call you perkeleen vittupää just to express my disgust and frustration with this crap. - :from’.
/king/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Oh fuck off, just really fuck off you total dickface. Christ :name, you are fucking thick. - :from’.
/pink/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Well, Fuck me pink. - :from’.
/life/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck my life. - :from’, e.g. /life/Phil will return ‘Fuck my life. - Phil’
/chainsaw/:name/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, :name. Do I look like Mother Teresa? - :from’, e.g. /chainsaw/Chris/Heather will return 'Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, Chris. Do I look like Mother Teresa? - Heather
/thanks/:from
Will return content of the form ‘Fuck you very much. - :from’.
Alternative URLs
Roadmap
FOASS will be extended to include the following functionality:
- Random fuck offs (or Fuck Off of the Day), without having to specify the operation (off, you, everyone, donut etc) explicitly
- Internationalization based on Accept-Language.
All contributions are very welcome.
Not Written in Mozart.
Follow @foaas on twitter!
- Dionysus
